Life of the introvert

20130629-150321.jpgI find life interesting. I like to learn things, I like to do things. But often the things that I enjoy doing wouldn’t be considered very “social”. Things like blogging, computer gaming, TV boxsets and pizza. In most respects, I’m a bit of an introvert. And that’s OK. But sometimes I think the introvert gets a bad name for no apparent reason. So I thought I would make a stand for the introvert… In a way an introvert only can: hidden behind a computer, away from other people haha (although, to be specific- on my iPad in a villa on holiday)!

But in all this, I should point out that this isn’t a dig or a criticism of anyone specific, more of a reminder to us all (especially me) that we are all different and all deserve the same level of respect.

One thing I find remarkable is how everyone (me included) will automatically isolate themselves from people who are socially awkward. I do this. But the worst thing of all is that I am also socially awkward. Probably a what-comes-around-goes-around thing going on there somewhere. But it’s so true. But it’s so sad. Because its isolation like that which will keep the introvert from ever bettering their understanding of social environments and will unquestionably deteriorate their enjoyment of social times…

I can speak from experience here. So many times of late, I have just completely avoided social situations because I can’t be bothered for complete awkwardness closely followed by the person then searching for any reason to excuse themselves from the conversation. It’s not that I ant things to be awkward, I just find social situations difficult.

How do we counter this awkward social game of cat-and-mouse that we all play in one way or another? Well I think to find the solution, we need to look a bit deeper into the issue. You see, conversation is only a small portion of the introvert vs extrovert personality clash.

I think there is an unspoken mutual disrespect from one to the other. The extroverts see the introverts as nerdy, inside people who are too quiet to ever be interesting. Meanwhile the introverts see the extroverts as loud, overpowering chatter-boxes who are desperate to reach the top.

Obviously, this is just the way I see it. I’m probably wildly over generalising here, but you can probably imagine the direction I am coming from here. I think the key is obvious, a bit more respect for both. I think the introverts could stand to respect the extroverts more. But I really do think that the extroverts have a bigger responsibility. They need to start accommodating for the introverts. In conversation, in family, in business, in communities and in friendship circles.

Can I say, as an introvert, one of my biggest pet-peeves is the motivational rant. I’m sorry, I get that some people require passion to get things done – and that’s fine. But I think there needs to be an understanding from the extroverts that passion can be displayed very differently across social character. Just because we aren’t jumping up and down and shoving it down people’s throats about something doesn’t mean we don’t believe in it. We all really need to consider that there are more than one way of demonstrating belief in something. One way is no better than another.

And I think this is one of the main things – that neither the introvert or the extrovert are “correct”. And the moment that one tries to “convert” the other is utterly ridiculous. Speaking from the introvert perspective, I wouldn’t want to be any other way- it’s who I am! So when someone tells me I need to demonstrate a more outgoing behaviour, it grinds my gears. And I’m sure the extroverts feel the same about the way that they are. Introverts wouldn’t go around telling people to stop being so outgoing! So I guess what I’m saying is, we need to stop trying change people and respect people for who they are, even if they don’t act, react and interact the same as you.

We can do it. I can do it. And since this blog is mainly targeted at the Sholdstock-personal demographic, I think this blog post has served it’s purpose. And I think this may be first of a few “introvert”-themed blog posts.